Are you sick of having tons of breakups in one breakup? You know what I mean. You want to break up with him. You have a talk. You tell him you are breaking up with him, then five days later you find yourself in the sac with him again. And this cycle usually repeats itself an unreasonable amount of times. All you ever wanted was to break up! But you didn’t do it the right way. Here are 5 essential guidelines to a successful breakup: Be sure to schedule the breakup conversation.

Make it clear to him that the conversation you want to have is serious. When you tell him, say it NO UNCERTAIN TERMS. Leave no room for questions or hope for the future. Put your reluctance to hurt him aside and do this for yourself. Tell him, “I am breaking up with you for good.” Ask him, “do you understand?” If he says he doesn’t, help him to understand: “I don’t want to be with you anymore and I will not be talking to you for an indefinite period of time.” He will try to plead with you.

He will text you and he will call. Don’t read his texts no matter what. Ignore the calls. Block him if you know it will be too hard. You must send him the message that you are serious. The more you don’t reciprocate, the quicker he will get used to it. And his attempts will become further and fewer between. Avoid conversations about him. If you live in a small town or he is part of your network of friends, don’t try to find out what he’s been up to. You don’t need to know. You shouldn’t know.

It’s none of your business and it will only hurt you. It could lead to getting back together and then yet another breakup! Block him if you can’t control yourself. Don’t look at any of his posts. This will only keep you close to him. It will serve as a constant reminder and make it a lot easier for you to respond to his pleas. You need him out of sight out of mind! This is the hardest and most important one. Stick to your guns. Choose to stick with what is best for yourself.